Tuesday, August 26, 2008

On Fear and Motivation

Sarah posted earlier and posed the question of what motivates? What gets us psyched about triathlon?

I identify a lot with Sarah because we are both training for our first half iron distance races. She races on 10/25, I race on 11/9. We seem to be going through some similar stuff – increased volume and intensity of workouts, the realization that "oh crap, it's really almost here" kind of stuff. Milestones are being set with astonishing regularity as we undergo the rigorous training that needs to happen to be prepared for an event of 70.3 miles.

What motivates me lately is fear. There is, literally, no room for slacking. And because there is no room for slacking, I do the workouts. I do them whether I feel like it or not, because with the race so close, I simply can't afford not to. And, for the first time, I am heeding Coach's advice and not looking at the next week in Training Peaks. I mean really, with all that is looming over me this week, do I really need to know? I think not.

It's not just training that is looming over me. I am working more and enjoying my work much more than I used to. I am making changes. And that's a GREAT thing. It's actually just the right time for that too because it puts my training in perspective. I don't have as much time to sit around and think about my training, think about how tired I am, how sore I am, how much I just don't want to swim 3100 yards today . . . I just do it. Because if I don't, well . . . I won't even think about that. That type of thinking has no place here. Silverman is MY race. I have it within me to do everything in my power to make sure that I am at my best on that day and SUCCEED!

My confidence is still there, it has just gotten quieter. I am more focused. Determined. At this point, actions speak louder than words. 12+ hours of training this week. That's some action.

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